Readjusting

When I woke up this morning, the rain was just pouring from the sky.  The weather has been a little odd for February in this area.  The temperatures have been in the 40's, and we have had no snow to speak of.

But, I heard on the news that it may snow tomorrow--2 to 5 inches!

So, we'll wait and see.  The weather is a lot like life.  Something is predicted, an event is planned upon, the future has been seen in the way that we want our lives to reflect.

Then, surprise!  Just as no snowflakes fall from the sky as predicted, our lives can take what we consider to be a wrong turn.

I experienced one of those events last year when my eyes failed me.  My life is totally different than I imagined at this time in my life.  

I spent a good portion of last year waiting........waiting for my vision to improve, waiting for someone to pick me up when I couldn't drive, waiting for doctor appointments, just waiting and waiting for something to change, something to happen.  

To be truthful, I became very tired of the waiting.  Nothing was changing, nothing was happening and I felt as though life had been put on hold for a time.  

More than making physical adjustments to my life, I had to make major attitude and outlook adjustments.

I'm not saying this was easy.  In fact, it was very difficult.  I've had to accept the fact that I am dependent upon others in some areas.  I find myself constantly saying, "I'm sorry" when I have to ask anyone to do anything for me.  And I'm constantly being told to stop saying this.  

I've had to learn to lean. 

I've had to learn to be still.

And I've discovered a beauty in the leaning and stillness.  Time for quiet, time for reflection, time for worship, time for gratitude for the small things.

All in all, what I considered to be a "wrong turn" had righted itself to a straight and narrow path. 

What about you?  Do you have any experiences where a "wrong turn" righted itself into the correct path for your life?

I'd love to hear about it!

See you tomorrow!

Beth 

 

 

 

Forgiveness

I was straightening some dresser drawers today, and I came upon a card that was sent to me in response to a prayer request I had made at church some 6 years ago.

The front of the card says:

Forgive Others

You will need compassion and empathy

"Those who cannot forgive others break the bridge

over which they themselves

must pass."

Confucious

The back of the card says:

We all get angry at times, even at the people who mean the most to us.  But imagine if we stayed angry at them and shut them out of our lives.  Our world wouldn't be the same.  Forgiveness diffuses our anger and opens a dialogue for a better relationship.  Even if the pain is hard to forget, forgiveness feels right because it liberates the soul. 

Simple Steps

Forgive from the heart first.  If you can find it in your heart to forgive, you can express it later in words and actions.

Don't hold a grudge.  Think of a grudge as a five hundred pound monster.  The effort required to hold it is enormous.  Write the feelings for your grudge in a letter, then toss it into the fireplace.  You'll feel more powerful than the beast itself.  

I remember asking for help forgiving this person so many years ago.  It was difficult, took time and effort on my part.  I knew this person was never going to say "I'm sorry" or even admit to any wrongdoing.

But, the bitterness and anger were eating me alive while this person was living life as if nothing had ever happened.

I had to let go, give the hurt and sorrow to God.  This struggle is not mine to deal with.  

I still have to have contact with this person from time to time.  I no longer feel the anger, the sorrow, the angst of my heart and mind. 

Forgiveness does not mean that the hurt done against us is right.  It gives us the freedom to move on with our lives and not be held hostage.

I think I'll hold on to this card.

Any thoughts?

See you tomorrow!

Beth

 

Happy Sunday!

Happy Sunday to All!

Just a short into about me---

I am 63 years old.  Some days I feel younger, some days I feel older.  I worked for a rather large health system for almost 25 years--almost made it through the 25th year until my eye problems no longer allowed me to use the computer for 8+ hours a day.  

I have three grown children--a son who is almost 36, and two daughters ages 34 and almost 32.

Then there are the two little girls--my granddaughters--ages 7 and 2.  

We celebrate birthdays together as a family.  Traditionally, the birthday boy or girl can choose whatever they would like for a main course.  That is usually made by one of my two daughters.  Sides are added, and we have a birthday party!

My oldest granddaughter, Lydia, and I are in charge of the cake.  We talk and decide what kind of cake is that person's favorite and try to make it special for them.

The picture below is one of our greatest efforts.  We made this last year for my youngest daughter who just happens to love owls.  

   

Sorry for the sideways view--I just couldn't get his picture to rotate!

 

I also knit her these fingerless owl gloves for her present:

My son's birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks.  Lydia and I have been discussing his cake.  His favorite is chocolate with peanut butter frosting which we could do in a snap.

Then Lydia saw this cake:

Oreo Ice Cream Sandwich Cake

My son does love ice cream cake, so I think this will be what Lydia and I will be making for him this year.  This recipe is here if you think you'd like to try it!  And, if you do, please stop back and let me know how you like it!

Have a great Sunday, and I'll see you tomorrow!

Beth

 

The Aches

I've been having a few "extra achy" days, particularly in my hands, feet and shoulders.  Could be a change in the weather?  

I babysat my youngest granddaughter yesterday.  She turned 2 in October, and just being with her lifted my spirits!  By the time I arrived home in the early afternoon, most of the aches were starting to fade a bit.  

Maybe there is a correlation there also? 

Today is Saturday, and that is the day I take my oldest granddaughter to her ballet and tap class.  She started dance class 4 years ago and really seems to enjoy this.  

I had planned on taking her to lunch and a bit of shopping afterward.  But, due to the pain I am having I decided that I just wasn't up to all of this today.

She is 7 years old, and I don't tell her beforehand about plans just on the chance that the weather may be bad or I may feel poorly and have to cancel.  I don't want to ever disappoint her in that way.  

Hopefully, tomorrow will bring a better day.  It seems when the aches are worse, my vision decreases also (thus the late post!).  

Since I'm only into my second week of treatment for the RA, I'm trying very hard to be patient.  My doctor did tell me that it could take up to 6 weeks to notice any change.  

Hope everyone had a good day!

See you tomorrow!

Beth      

Take Your Time

Friday is here!

I know to some of you, that may mean the end of your work week.  So, Happy Friday to you!

I thought I would show you the latest project I've been working on.  This has taken me quite some time due to my visual difficulties.  But, I've been  persistent in working the 16 row repeat every day.  

I've learned that doing a small amount each day is better than trying to overdo for a long period of time.  

This is a scarf I'm making for my cousin.  I made her fingerless gloves with the same Celtic knot pattern last year.  

I really like the braid pattern on the edges:

The edges seem to be rolling inward as the scarf is getting longer.  I'm thinking that a little steaming after I'm finished should take care of this problem.  

The pattern for this scarf is here, and it's written and charted (for those who like charts).  

So, you can see--with time and effort, we can still accomplish the things we used to do.  It just takes a little longer!

Would you please share with me some of the adjustments you've made in your own life?  This could be due to visual difficulties, rheumatoid arthritis, or whatever you yourself are trying to overcome.  

Together we can do this!

See you tomorrow!

Beth

Hopeful Expectation

As some of you know (and most do not), I underwent routine cataract surgery on February 10, 2016.

This led to numerous complications due to underlying factors that were not known to me or my doctor at the time of my surgery.

To say that this has been a difficult journey is definitely an understatement.  My physician and I have tried every treatment known to the pharmaceutical world (and some that were not).  

We are at the end of the line treatment-wise, and my life has changed immensely.  I am no longer able to do the majority of things that I used to do, at least for long periods of time.  

I recently was diagnosed and started treatment for rheumatoid arthritis which was one of the many underlying factors.  This autoimmune disease has affected not only my joints but also my eyes.  

I was an avid reader and loved to knit and crochet.  I can still do these things, but only for short bursts of time.  

As winter is upon us, and I've had to curtail a lot of the activities I used to enjoy, a kind of sadness has descended upon me.  

Life as I knew it has changed tremendously.  I feel old.  Granted, I am 63, but I never felt old until recently.  

I have to depend upon others for things I used to do myself, and that alone has contributed to this "oldness factor".  

So, I decided to start "Life Through My Eyes"--a daily blog--not based on sadness or age or disabilities.  A blog designed to help me, and hopefully you, focus on the positives of our lives.  We'll discuss our physical issues but not as our primary intent. 

There are many positives which are easy to lose sight of when you're dealing with physical issues.  Sadness and depression can come creeping in when you least expect it.  

But, together, we're going to combat this.  We're going to make the best of what we have and look to the future with a hopeful expectation.

See you tomorrow!

Beth